It’s halfway through January so I expect that most of us are back to whatever it was we were doing before we promised ourselves to change. ‘New Year, New You’ is but a faint memory. In fact, by the time you read this you probably have seen the resolutions you made over chocolates and mince pies dissipate like steam on a cold windowpane. All that’s left is a dripping puddle of forgotten ideals. Don’t be hard on yourself. You are not alone. In fact, by the second Friday of January, most people will have broken the promises that they made to themselves for a better 2025. It’s called ‘Quitter’s Day’ and this year it fell on Friday, January 10.
There are many reasons for Quitter’s Day. Lack of commitment, unrealistic goals, or basic human inadequacy are often declared to be the cause. However, these smack of guilt and self-recrimination, and there’s too much of that about these days. It doesn’t help unless feeling bad about yourself is your goal. The fact is that it’s not your fault. It’s a programming error.
I think that one of main problems with New Year’s resolutions is that they start too soon.
January 1 is a terrible time to start anything. It looks great on paper (especially if you still have a paper monthly calendar in the kitchen). It has a catchy ring to it. Start on the first day of the new year sounds great, but it’s actually a terrible time to go from zero to hero.
To start with, it is still Christmas. The twelve days are not over yet, and there’s five days of ‘Middelmas’ to go until the Epiphany and Women’s Little Christmas. The kids are still home from school. All the decorations are still up. The back hall is chock-a-block with extra recycling. You may have had a great New Year’s Eve and be feeling a bit more fragile on the first day of the new year. You are still in the twilight zone of the holidays. Here’s rule #1: don’t start until the Christmas tree is taken down and the house is back to normal.
Another reason not to jump into action on January 1 is the fact that It’s cold and dark most of the time. The day is very short. January 1 is near enough to the winter solstice to plunge us into night by 4:30pm. Personally I find heading out to do anything in the cold and dark challenging. Exercising in the cold and dark is unthinkable. I know that not everyone feels the same. I see you, jogging in the dark and I don’t know how you do it. When the sun goes down and takes the temperature with it, all that I want is to wrap myself in a blanket, sit near a fire and move as little as possible. Rule #2: don’t be getting notions about getting more active until it’s still light at 5pm.
Getting more exercise is one of the top five resolutions along with eating healthier and losing weight. Which is another reason why the first of January is a bad start date. In early January we haven’t finished all the chocolates and biscuits yet. So, what are you going to do with all the leftover Christmas goodies? You can’t just chuck them out. Rule #3: Don’t start any sort of diet, or healthy eating plan if you prefer, until you have cleared out all the Christmas goodies. Remember to consume guilt free.
This year not starting any resolutions too early was easy. The temperature dropped dramatically beyond the point where you can ignore it. I wore my alpaca hat most days. There was no way I was going anywhere to start anything. It was proper cold and dark for the first week of January and I’m not ashamed to confess that I was practically immobile as soon as the sun went down. It was lovely, much helped by the overabundance of lovely chocolates and assorted biscuits.
As we get past mid-January, things are starting to look more positive. We are slowly getting to the end of the goodies. I finished the dark chocolate-covered dates last night. I just need a few more friends to drop by for coffee to get through the giant box of Danish butter cookies. The temperature has been rising. I can feel myself slowly thawing. The light is on the way back. Yesterday it was still light at 5pm. Not quite a grand stretch, but uplifting all the same. If you go looking, you’ll see the stubby green shoots of daffodils poking through the ground. The Camellia at the bottom of the drive is in full bloom – all pink and yellow flounces. Spring is not in the air quite yet, but you get a sniff of it every now and then. I’m not quite there yet either, but I do feel like a new me is just around the corner. Rule #4 don’t give up even if you gave up. You still have plenty of time. Set your new year’s resolutions for some time in late February when there’s more light and no more Christmas chocolates left. Wishing you all a happy and healthy 2025.
