Now indoors with the door and windows wide open, I can still feel a gentle sea breeze brushing against my face and arms and circulating my little home here. My feet are bare, toes touching the ground and heels resting against the legs of the chair. All is well in this moment, this perfect moment of awareness, appreciation, and of living life fully. I love the simplicity of soaking it all in, this intentional taking in the good and savouring it. I take time to feel my body against all the surfaces, the ground, the chair, my elbows on the table or armrest, fingers touching the keyboard, and I repeatedly sense into the moment, almost exaggerating this momentary awareness of being present in this body, with no pressure, nothing to do, nowhere to go. Resting in the embrace of nature and this amazing natural world.  

And maybe because this dry, calm, sunny weather has been so rare this year, it seems extra precious and, I’m sure like most people, I want it to stay. We naturally want these good times to last, however, by the time it took me to move indoors, because the sun was cooling, I had received news of the deaths of two people I knew. A stark reminder that life is so unpredictable and can change in the blink of an eye. All the more reason for us to value our lives and the people and places we hold dear.  I pause and intentionally think of these affected families and a feeling inside of me stirs. Their grief resonates with me, and I feel deep discomfort and a sense of deep compassion for them.  

Compassion-based mindfulness encourages qualities like empathy, inclusion, solidarity and having the ability, as well as making the choice, to step into someone else’s shoes and offer compassion.

But while we can make choices every moment of our lives about how we live them, we really have no control over events that happen every day. So, there is something about noticing and relishing the good moments while accepting their impermanent nature and being able to sit with and accept the difficult moments too, instead of resisting them. Having the knowledge that a day going so smoothly and perfectly can be instantly interrupted can help us to be very grateful for those moments in the sun and our leisure time, simply because nothing stays the same for too long.  

Nature can be so reassuring amid all that’s happening within us and around us. It is a constant in our lives and yet always in a state of flux and flow. The amazing, heroic swallows are back and that fills so many of us with joy. To sit and watch them swooping and circling, imagining all they went through to get back here is truly awe-inducing. Perhaps our everyday mindfulness practices this month can be to garner moments of comfort from simply sitting listening to the birds or quietly watching the swallows. Can we put our phones and the news aside for a small while and feel the life that is bursting forth at this time of year? This poem ‘Allow’ by Danna Faulds is a nice one to contemplate.

‘There is no controlling life. / Try corralling a lightning bolt, / containing a tornado. Dam a

stream and it will create a new / channel. Resist, and the tide / will sweep you off your feet.

Allow, and grace will carry / you to higher ground. The only / safety lies in letting it all in – / the wild / and the weak; fear, / fantasies, failures and success. / When loss rips off the doors of / the heart, or / sadness veils your / vision with despair, practice / becomes simply bearing the truth. / In the choice to / let go of your / known way of being, the whole / world is revealed to your new eyes.’

Mindfulness in May

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, May 12, 19 and 26. €12. 

Beginners, returners and newcomers are always welcome.
For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email:
susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

FB: susanoreganmindfulness. www.mindhaven.ie

I thought it might be helpful to reflect on my experience of working with these new groups and how we can apply our practice to daily life in everyday ways, by ‘catching’ ourselves in the moments that make up our lives. Over eight wonderful weekly sessions together we practiced mindfulness meditation and explored our thoughts, feelings, emotions and sensory experiences. We reflected honestly and shared our experiences openly. We felt our feelings, laughed, cried and discovered our common humanity, realising that we were all much more similar than different. We practiced some mindful eating and mindful movement. We learned that our minds are busy, but by practicing meditation, they will gradually begin to settle.  

Alongside our growing awareness of ourselves and others, we practiced gratitude, self-compassion and loving kindness for ourselves and all living beings. We discovered that, even though taking our time and moving slowly, we still covered a lot of ground. By examining our habits in terms of which were nourishing or depleting us, we all committed to paying more attention to how we were spending our time. I was struck, and very often moved, by everyday examples that people shared of what they had been noticing between one week and the next. Often, on the face of it, little things, but I see them as ‘little big things’, or even huge things, because, once brought into awareness, they invite potential change, growth, softening.

Some of the benefits that participants shared were so rich and impactful. Examples include, stopping to have breakfast quietly, sitting eating meals slowly and tasting the food, driving slower, improved sleep, enjoying time on holidays better, noticing that we have a choice if we ‘catch’ ourselves in the moment. This ‘catching the moment’ can work in two ways, catching ourselves about to react to a situation, in our usual, habitual way or catching a special moment in our lives and really savouring that moment, as if ‘banking’ it, making a deposit in our long-term memory for our future.  

One example of a habit noticed that perhaps we can all identify with, was of feeling annoyance, even intolerance towards, slow drivers or slow-moving vehicles. Habitually, our response might be to get too close to the offending vehicle, to feel a build-up of impatience, frustration, anger as we wait to overtake. But bringing mindfulness to the situation and noticing or catching the moment of annoyance as it arises can bring an awareness of choice. Hang on, we have a choice here. We can either get highly stressed which takes a toll on our wellbeing or we can simply take our time and wait behind the lorry or tractor until we can find a safe place to pass, then breathe, feel our hands on the wheel and overtake without hardly any stress at all.

Conversely, a striking example of a participant catching themselves in a ‘good’ moment, was someone who was about to go sea swimming off a rock but was finding it impossible to get in.  Because of the tide, she would have to wait or go to a different beach. Instead of rushing off to another spot, she had the realisation in her own mind that, hang on, “This is a moment in my life”.  So, with this awareness, she chose to stay on that rock until the tide changed and had her swim.

Reassured, affirmed and encouraged by this generous group sharing, I was repeatedly reminded that mindfulness meditation really matters, it has meaning and long-lasting impact on people’s everyday lives. Mindfulness meditation can be this grounding, steadying, joyful, lifeforce, providing us with skills we can all learn to help us on our life’s journey.  Skills that, once the foundation has been laid, require consistent practice to grow and strengthen, both formally, through meditation, and informally, through how we live our everyday lives. It is pure privilege to be a conduit of these practical yet life-changing skills and practices, and something that I will be forever grateful for. The simple, yet profound, quote from writer Annie Dillard seems fitting here. “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”

Mindfulness in April

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, April 14, and 2h. €12.  Beginners, returners and newcomers are always welcome.

A free three-week compassion-based mindfulness programme for family carers will run at Mossie’s in Adrigole, Beara beginning Thursday April 23, 12-3pm.

For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 
www.mindhaven.ie

For about a week before writing this I’d been feeling out of sorts, that kind of discombobulated feeling that is so hard to describe, and today I admit, I had a very rough day.  You could say it was out of the blue, but in hindsight I might have predicted it, February has some significant family birthdays.  I spent the first part of today raging at the world in one way or another, and then for the second part I cried my eyes out, that awful, raw, familiar, sobbing that physically hurts and that you think might not stop. It had been a while since I’d been in this kind of desperate state and my own sense of myself was that I have been doing ok. 

Despite regularly having the fear that I am somehow ‘stuck’ in it, because you read about these things, I am stepping through my grief.  However, the vulnerability and fragility of our human make-up means that we have very real, sore grief triggers that can rupture at any time, perhaps more so on birthdays or anniversaries.  And whilst ‘progressing’, if that’s even an appropriate word, through it, there are so many rough, painful, bumps on the road. Some are worse than others, and at times it can even feel like we’re back at square one, but we’re not. Several people cautioned me that the second year of grief is worse than the first. At this stage, 17 months on, I’m living a simply day-to-day life and am very grateful for my slow, but for the most part, steady-enough recovery and a growing ability to genuinely feel the joy and see the beauty of life again.

Losing my lovely brother in 2024 has changed me and my life profoundly, in ways I’m still discovering, and these changes are still so difficult to ‘marry’ with my previous life and very hard to explain if anyone asks or has any expectations of me. When you don’t even fully recognise yourself, it must be hard for others to recognise you. Some of the time I have anxiety around it and feel like I’m trying to please people by trying to say the correct thing, the thing they want to hear, that I’m fine, that I’m loving my life. This kind of ‘pretending’ doesn’t sit well with me, in fact I find it almost impossible, no matter how hard I try. I can see how grief feels a bit like being an imposter, that feeling of being separate, disconnected or not belonging in circles or places where previously you had felt so at home.

It’s such a strange phenomenon really and a very tough journey that at some point we all face. There are so many days when I feel at peace and content, filled with gratitude for all the gifts in life but there’s no denying I had to go through some difficult February days, trashing around with my feelings, looking for someone or something to blame, re-visiting old wounds. There’s no way round it, but I truly believe that it is kindness and compassion that encourage us back to wholeness, and that very much includes self-compassion. So it is with intention that I approach the end of the month with awareness and care. I’m writing this in the hope that someone reading it may take comfort.  Because grief can make you feel like you’re going or have gone mad, that you don’t fit, or belong, that you’ve said the wrong thing. You are not alone and this too shall pass.

It has been by opting out of a few kind invitations, resting, and purposefully engaging in good and wholesome wellness practices that I have returned to some kind of equilibrium again. I’ve been practicing loving kindness meditation practice, which I’ve heard described as the antidote to both fear and anger, both of which visit me regularly. It is a very helpful meditation practice where we wish ourselves and others well. As we meditate, we gently repeat phrases, or well wishes to ourselves, like, ‘May I be happy, may I be well’. For me it feels like a softening, accepting practice. I’m learning to accept my grief as part me and my life now and I know there will be plenty times like this again but also plenty times of joy. A lifelong friend recently assured me that if we don’t allow ourselves to fully process our grief, we deprive ourselves of being able to truly love life. I took great comfort in this. Poetry and nature, my other friends, are also great comforters.

‘Ocean’ 

by Mary Oliver

I am in love with Ocean / lifting her thousands of white hats / in the chop of the storm, / or lying smooth and blue, the / loveliest bed in the world. / In the personal life, there is

always grief more than enough, / a heart-load for each of us / on the dusty road. I suppose / there is a reason for this, so I will be / patient, acquiescent. But I will live / nowhere except here, by Ocean, trusting / equally in all the blast and welcome / of her sorrowless, salt self.’

Mindfulness in March
Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, March 3, 10 and 24. €12. Beginners, returners and newcomers are always welcome.

For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

FB:susanoreganmindfulness

www.mindhaven.ie

Knowing that Christmas would be infused with bittersweet feelings of love and loss, I decided early in November to book a place on the new year ‘Good in the Beginning’ retreat at Dzogchen Beara.  I needed and wanted a wholesome, purposeful turning towards 2026. What an insightful few days it was, a retreat that I would highly recommend at the turning of the year. Not only was it structured very well over the five days, but it was guided by a team of very wise and approachable teachers. We were served delicious, healthy meals and had plenty of time to walk, chat, or rest between sessions.  The icing on the cake was being blessed with spectacular Winter sunlight from New Year’s Eve onwards.  It was as if the grey skies for the first few days cleared as we let go of 2025 and set our aspirations for 2026.  

The retreat teachers reminded us of how precious our human lives are and touched upon many Buddhist concepts like impermanence, and through contemplative practices even had us reflect on our own death, which was interesting. For me, this reinforced a desire to live life as fully as possible with an awareness of meaningful moments, and what really matters. It was deep, slow time, interspersed with periods of silence that I very much appreciated. There was no pressure at all, no judgement, no advice. My experience was one of sharing my human vulnerabilities with strangers, all on similar paths, whilst at the same time fuelling up on many great moments of connection and meaning with other precious human beings. I left with a real sense of gratitude, along with some welcome momentum and forward motion into this new year.

I found, at first, that I had great physical resistance to letting go of last year. I realised that I was gripping it tightly, hanging on for dear life. I’m not sure why, because it was an extremely difficult year, you’d imagine it would be easy to let it go. This was not the case, however, and the retreat itself was not always easy. Indeed, there were several times when I had an urge to just head off home, persuading myself that I had done enough or that I was tired, but the reality is that I wanted to run because something in the teaching or the practice had touched upon my own suffering and it hurt to stay. But it is by staying on our seat that we face life directly, be that pleasant or unpleasant thoughts, emotions, physical sensations. It was stirring but ultimately healing and I left holding things a bit more loosely.  

I felt like a beginner at times, and that is what I love about meditation, it is never the same experience twice. Each time we sit is different, there is a newness to each experience because each moment is new, the past has gone, the future is not yet here, this moment is all we have. And what is here, now, in this moment, when you pay attention? Something I noticed physically was the amount of tension and soreness in my body, especially my shoulders and back, that I can’t remember being aware of prior to the retreat. My body feels a lot lighter and much less tense after the few days of softening into meditative practices and allowing the mind to rest in the body.

I truly believe that you come away from spending special, intentional time like this a better person than when you first arrive, leaving with a bit more compassion for yourself as well as for others. I generally love the fresh, new beginnings of this time of year and am going to attempt each day to live this precious human life to the best of my ability, moment by moment, taking each day as it comes, without being afraid to look inside, even if there’s discomfort, in the words of John O Donohue, I will have courage and “risk being disturbed and changed”.  

“May my mind come alive today / To the invisible geography / That invites me to new frontiers, / To break the dead shell of yesterdays, / To risk being disturbed and changed…” / May I have the courage today / To live the life that I would love, / To postpone my dream no longer / But do at last what I came here for / And waste my heart on fear no more”.

Mindfulness in January 

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, January 13, 20 and 27. €12.  Beginners, returners and newcomers are always welcome.

For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

FB @ susanoreganmindfulness

www.mindhaven.ie

These two concepts are key to being awake in our lives, representing ‘the penny dropping’ for us, and both are worthy of further reflection. Firstly, the misconception that mindfulness is merely about relaxation. I can understand where this idea comes from, because when we meditate regularly, we can learn how to get to a place of peace and calm in our minds. At first, it’s almost like a space clearing or a decluttering of the mind which allows the mind and body to settle. This leads us to an increased awareness or clearer seeing of life as it is, which in turn can lead us into taking more responsibility for our lives and how we choose to live them. Then it is more about waking up, being aware that we have choices in whether to respond or react to life situations, so compassion-based mindfulness builds skills are not simply once off, for relaxation, but rather sustained skills, developing over time.   

The second concept that struck home for participants is that this moment, now, is the only moment we have. This can bring a sense of excitement, not a clinging to any moment or experience but being there for it, living it. For example, I often recall a moment in time when my dad started singing to me one day. Out of the blue he said, “did you ever hear this one?” and launched into it. Of course, my first thought was to search for my phone to record him, but lucky enough my inner wisdom spoke louder and I paused, turned, and listened to my dad sing a song I had never heard before. Because I listened so well, I remember the tenderness of the moment still, as well as the words, and looked them up later to find the Scottish ‘Tiree love song’. Which do you think was the wiser choice, to grab my phone, and miss half the song or to pause and listen fully, soaking in the moment? 

So, we are selling ourselves short if we view mindfulness as merely a form of relaxation and because this very moment is the only moment we are assured of, surely the lesson then is to not waste it. Instead of running from ourselves, distracting ourselves, busying ourselves – can we pause and really see, feel and experience life fully, letting the comfort exist alongside the discomfort? On a total aside, or maybe it is related, I have always wanted to be able to sing in company, but shyness and anxiety got in my way. Still, I made it my ambition to sing some songs for my dad and Dermot, who were great singers and I am so proud to say that, literally on a high note, I have sung a few out in public, including the Tiree love song. I felt shy, self-conscious and faltering but very encouraged by a warm and friendly Adrigole audience. Seizing the moment, as a now or never one, the only one I had, and in my own way, honouring those who have gone before us, letting their love and light shine through us.

Please don’t forget my ‘Live your Legacy’ mindfulness workshop on Sunday, November 30, 2 – 4pm at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap. This will be a very gentle workshop where we will sit together and practice some guided meditations to help cultivate a felt-sense of kindness in us and gratitude for the gifts that have been bestowed upon us in our lives. We will also have space to reflect on our own legacy. This November event is free but is a fundraiser for Eden Valley Hospice and the Kevin Bell Repatriation Trust. Please support these two wonderful charities by booking your space on my workshop and/or making a donation if you feel inclined at paypal.me/susanoreganmindhaven.  I’ll leave you this month with the very beautiful Tiree Love Song.

‘He-ree he-ro my bonnie wee girl / He-ree he-ro my fair one / Will you come away my love / To be my own my rare one?

Smiling the land! Smiling the sea! / Sweet is the scent of the heather / Would we were yonder, just you and me / The two of us together!

All the day long, out on the peat / Then by the shore in the gloaming / Stepping it lightly with dancing feet / And we together roaming.’

Mindfulness in November 

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, November 4, 18 and 25. €12. Beginners, returners and newcomers are always welcome.

‘Live your legacy’ workshop Sunday, November 30, 2-4pm at CECAS, Myross Wood. A fundraiser for Eden Valley Hospice and the Kevin Bell Repatriation Trust.   

For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com. www.mindhaven.ie.

And when we step back and focus on what is here and now, we become less inclined to add our own version to stories or engage in gossip. Instead, we can grow in awareness of what is happening, without embellishment, and deal with actualities rather than surmising, as best we can. Mindfulness training gently supports us to turn towards the here and now, which may not be easy at times, especially if our present moment situation seems intolerable, but still, that nudge to turn towards what’s here has two-fold benefits. Firstly, we learn to acknowledge, feel and soothe difficult feelings and secondly, we’re encouraged to focus on what is good in our lives. Neuropsychologist, Rick Hanson compares our minds to Velcro for negative experiences, in that, they “stick” to us and Teflon for the positive experiences, in that, they slide off us immediately. Over time, with practice, however, we can train our minds to more easily not only see, but savour, the good. 

There is a simple experiential technique in mindfulness with the acronym, G.L.A.D. that I will describe this month. Even if it’s a difficult situation that you are beginning with, there are still lessons for us if we can accept that everything is changing, all of the time, and we too can allow ourselves permission to change and grow. The G.L.A.D. technique aligns with the principle of neuroplasticity, which, put very simply, means that what we feed grows. The habits we practice grow stronger, whether that be habits for example, like gossiping, blame, backbiting, exclusion or kindness, mindfulness, meaning making, compassion. The G.L.A.D. technique has four questions for reflection as follows; G – what am I grateful for today or in this moment?  L – what did I learn today?  A – what did I accomplish?  D – what has delighted me?

Because the world is so full of challenges now, it is a practice that can support our minds and possibly lead to a change in our own focus.  It’s a simple technique, easy to remember, that allows us time to reflect and provides much food for thought.  G – what you are grateful for today, not what you ‘think’ you should be feeling grateful for. For example, today I am grateful for living in a safe, peaceful part of the world.  L – what did you learn today? This can be something about yourself, a simple realisation or detail, something you read or saw. I learned the value of connection by being open and sharing our experiences with others in safe, non-judgemental spaces.  

A – what did you accomplish? This need not be any grand accomplishment and could be as simple as stepping outside for some fresh air, having a shower, eating a healthy breakfast, taking a few mindful breaths. My massive achievement was that I washed my dog’s blankets. This was on my mind for a while so now it’s done, and it feels great. D – What has delighted you? Maybe a sensory experience, something you saw, or heard, a sound from nature or a piece of music you love? These days it always seems to be the rabbits, ponies and swallows in the field outside my new home that bring me constant delight. What is bringing you joy or delight these summer days? Take a moment to notice how moments of delight or joy feel in your body. These summer days are, like time itself, so very precious, as expressed by poet Danna Faulds in this excerpt.

“Time is precious, minutes disappearing like water into sand, unless you choose to pay attention.  Since you do not know the number of your days, treat each as if it is your last. Be that compassionate with yourself, that open and loving to others, that determined to give what is yours to give and let in the energy and the wonder of the world”.

Mindfulness in July 

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, July 8, 15 and 22 and 29, 2025. €12. Beginners and newcomers are always welcome.

Keep an eye on my facebook page for summer mindfulness in nature workshops at CECAS.

For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

Find me on Facebook or www.mindhaven.ie

I meant to use the phrase “live and let live” as my title but I repeatedly typed “live and let love” by mistake, so I just went with it! I have been offered a fresh start, and presented with an opportunity to rest and recalibrate, to restore my physical, mental and emotional health. Also, a chance to reflect on what really matters, re-examine family boundaries, and revisit the values that I aspire to live by, like authenticity and integrity. These values are very important to me and are a core part of living a mindful life. Because we view the world through different lenses, we can so often get tangled up in ‘stuff’ that has nothing to do with us really. We make our own choices. For me, having so little left in the tank, with my physical health improving, I made conscious choices for both wellbeing and integrity, seeking out people and places that nourish and nurture me in this new phase of recovery.  

One thing I love about my move so far is the downsizing. I’m living in a much smaller, more manageable space, which means it is easier to keep tidy and organised. And because I am living more rurally, I need to be organised with my shopping and am putting my focus into healthy food, rest, meditation, exercise, water and plenty of good, kind company. It’s back to the beginning again, after limping along, in every possible sense of the word, for the last eight months and; unable to manage much physically, this move feels like, not alone learning to walk again, but learning to live again, with mindfulness and compassion at the centre of it all.

Looking back over the last eight months I am relieved to have survived them, there were many moments when I really doubted that I would make it. My hope in this moment and moving forward is to cultivate mindful acceptance of life as it is now, living with loss, along with a sense of compassion for myself as well as others. What I have learned firsthand over the last while is that we humans are all so fragile and breakable and given enough challenging life events, any one of us can be pushed to our very life limits. We need to go easy on ourselves and on each other. Slowing down and learning to take life moment by moment, day by day is a natural tonic during tough times. Mindfulness meditation helps with every aspect of this; it helps us to turn towards ourselves and take responsibility for our own life, with empathy and compassion.

I believe it’s good to look within and to share both vulnerability and imperfections, as part of our human experience and I know that I model imperfection very well! This monthly writing is my attempt to apply mindfulness to my own life experiences with the intention that it might be of benefit to someone else. At times I wonder if my writing gets too personal, and last month I admit to feeling a little bit of trepidation sending in my monthly piece. However, as luck would have it, I received many messages from people assuring me that my writing, indeed resonates with others. I aspire to live and work with integrity and to practice what I ‘preach’ but that’s not to say that I don’t regularly ‘fall off the wagon’ in some shape or form.  

So, thank you for all the assurances and kind words. I was very moved and encouraged by comments from a man from my home parish that I met in the graveyard. His kind words and encouragement to keep writing really struck a chord with me. I hope he’s reading this; his words meant a lot to me. We all respond well to praise and kindness, and it is so easy to get in the habit of looking at the negative in ourselves or someone else. So, instead of judging ourselves or others maybe there is someone you can recall today, a family member, friend, neighbour or stranger that you can intentionally offer kindness towards.

This poem by Erich Fried gives us the permission to follow our inner nudges, even if they don’t always make sense. “It is nonsense, says reason. ‘It is what it is, says love.’  It’s a disaster, says logic.  It’s nothing but pain, says fear.  It’s hopeless says common sense.  ‘It is what it is, says love.’  It’s ridiculous, says pride. It’s foolhardy, says prudence. It’s impossible, says experience. ‘It is what it is, says love.’” Erich Fried.

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10-11am, June 10, 17 and 24, 2025. €12. Beginners and newcomers are always welcome.

For more information: phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

Mindfulness for men during Men’s Health Week, Wednesday, June 11, 6-7pm at Bridge Street Community Cafe, in Bantry.  Free event but please book your place by phoning 083 149 1543.

FB: susanoreganmindfulness

www.mindhaven.ie

As children and young people, some of us are very attuned to our surroundings, to gut feelings and hunches, dreams, and so on. But over time, life takes over and this intuitive aspect to us can be dampened down, either by ourselves or others, and is often not encouraged in mainstream circles.  Mindfulness practice supports us to connect with our inner selves again, our minds and bodies, thoughts, feelings and sensations. We regularly check in with our internal happenings, but we also notice the finer detail in our surroundings, maybe even finding ourselves more sensitive to relational dynamics, atmospheres, nuanced tones. For me personally, the last six months have been very unsettled by grief and a feeling of being a stranger in my own life, as if I simply cannot fit back into it.  And the reality is that I can’t, life feels very different in so many ways; it has taken on a new, deeper meaning.

Speaking with some dear friends recently, the old tradition of dressing in black for a full year after the loss of a loved one was mentioned. This dress code acted as a visible signal to give a mourner some leeway, to treat this bereaved one with tenderness and care. But life has gotten so busy for everyone nowadays that we may forget what is going on for someone else. Life goes on. The expectation is that we’re supposed to move along with it. We’re all different in our ways of coping with grief, I’m finding this loss particularly hard so I’m sticking with my own pace. I was very close to my brother Dermot and his death is having a profound impact on me. I have had other close bereavements in my life but have never known suffering like those initial months following his death.   As a result, I am moving forward slowly, as gently as I can, honouring my grief when it comes and leaving space for it to subside, aware of human vulnerability and fragility. My mindfulness practice helps hugely.

Even though mindfulness meditation is a practical skill that can be learned in a secular fashion, which is how I mainly run my sessions, my personal meditation practice is a spiritual one. I believe that our loved one’s spirit lives on, that they walk beside us. I also hope for this with all my being, as it brings great comfort. This hope is affirmed by my lifelong ‘knack’ of arriving somewhere precisely at a time of disaster; I used to say it was a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. However, my experience of arriving ‘by chance’ in England on the first day that Dermot’s illness really took hold, has shifted my thinking. Because I was so blessed to be able to be by his side, I now believe my gift is to arrive in ‘the right place at the right time’. This trusting of an intuitive hunch, an inner feeling or a ‘knowing’ to be with someone or somewhere has served me well in my life so far.

And just as I spent those precious last weeks, days, hours, moments with Dermot, I truly believe that he is minding me now. I like to believe he is putting things in my way that will help me carry the weight of his departure from this life and that he continues to source kindness for me from some very unexpected people and places, that have already carried me through some very dark days. Kindness has enriched my journey in so many ways and in turn encourages me to pass it on to both friends and strangers and continue to live a precious, simple, helpful life. My short-term plan is to spend the lovely long months ahead, resting as much as possible, and allowing myself space to recalibrate and for things to unfold as they will.

I am fostering my intuition again, because after Dermot’s death, I immediately felt what I can only describe as a physical ‘draw’ or call towards the wilds of nature. I’ve had this strong, embodied yearning to be living closer to wild, raw, nature. I’m not sure why, but I suspect to heal myself and recover in a peaceful, natural place. I wanted this so badly and many of you will have heard that I have been on the lookout for a caravan or some other form of rural living. With Summer fast approaching, however, I had neither the energy nor the wherewithal to organise anything, until, without effort, a beautiful kind pathway opened before me, and I took a step forward. In short, through the pure and unsung kindness of old and new friends, I have found a place where my closest neighbours are rabbits, and the closest sound is birdsong. A simple, peaceful, healing place where I can rest and restore by letting nature be my guide. The right place at the right time.

Drop-in mindfulness hour at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings 10 – 11am, May 6, 13, 20 and 27, 2025.  €12.  Beginners and newcomers are always welcome.

Slow down those busy thoughts – a mindfulness workshop for Clonakilty wellness week, May 19 at Clonakilty College of FET, Western Road. 

Booking essential.087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

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www.mindhaven.ie

The phrase “the path is obstacles”, or variations of it, is a familiar one in Buddhist psychology, reflecting the nature of life. There is no doubt that life is full of ups and downs and very often we have much less control over what happens next than we might think we do. Mindfulness skills can help us to manage uncertain situations, because no matter how much we plan or attempt to steer or schedule our lives, unexpected news can arrive out of the blue and cause a lot of upset and uncertainty. And sometimes there is no amount of ‘fixing’ because some things just cannot be fixed.  The situation will unfold as it will, and we can either resist it or learn to accept it as it is.

Last month I wrote about feeling well resourced. The key learning for me is that we need to continue resourcing ourselves daily because there simply ‘will’ be obstacles along the way. In my weekly drop-in class, which lasts one hour, I usually guide two meditations, after which we take some time to reflect. We have such meaningful discussions about life’s joys, challenges, our vulnerabilities and commonalities, our imperfections as human beings. We reflect on all things human, the delights, mistakes, regrets, the fun, hurts, joys, thoughts, challenges. This hour can anchor and resource us and help keep us steady when met with obstacles on our way through life.

And while we may need to accept the obstacles that appear before us, we have the option to choose behaviours that boost our happiness and wellbeing. There is work known as the ‘Happiness Advantage’ based on research by Shaun Achor that I came across years ago and have never forgotten.  In summary, it suggests, in no particular order, five daily habits that we can practice for cultivating a happier outlook on life. If you are facing some difficulties or finding it hard to accept summers end, adopting these habits might be a nice way to adjust to the changing season. They don’t take long to integrate into daily life.

The first daily habit suggested is meditation. Try not to be daunted, it is possible to start with one minute and build up your practice over time. Secondly, if you haven’t already, can you build the habit of exercise into your everyday life. I use an online mindful movement/dance website which has a daily work-out of about 30 minutes. Next, write down three things that you are grateful for every day and journal about one positive experience that you have had in the last 24 hours. Lastly, the suggestion is to carry out a random act of kindness every day – this could be a kind thought, word or deed, noticing how it feels to do something kind for someone else.

So, when some things are beyond our control or influence, it can help to focus on aspects in our lives that we have some choice and influence over, which strengthen and resource us. As well as accepting that the path is obstacles, we can also let the path be happiness. I opened with the first half and will end with the second half of this beautiful poem called ‘Perfect’ by Rachel Holstead that seems to fit with the impermanence of life and the changing season. “…Set your feet on the ground again and let yourself flow with the earth’s turning. There is no perfection but this dance with all its colours, nothing to do but the living and letting go of every moment”.

In September I will be facilitating a free mindfulness-based programme for family carers at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap. This is a down-to-earth and nourishing programme where we spend time, in a gentle and supported way, connecting with ourselves, others and with nature. Once completed, people then have the opportunity, if they wish, to join a monthly mindfulness/peer support gathering for family carers, which has been running for over a year now and is growing from strength to strength. This year’s Reconnect and Re-engage family carers programme runs on three consecutive weeks from 10.30am – 1.30pm and includes a light lunch. The dates are Wednesday, September 25 and October 2, 9.  It is free of charge thanks to the support of Cork ETB and the 2024 REACH fund. 

Drop-in mindfulness sessions at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings through-out September (3, 10, 17, 24) from 10 – 11am.  €12. All are welcome to join this wonderful community of practice.  Anyone inspired to give mindfulness meditation a go please get in touch or just come along; it is so supportive to meditate together in a group and in this beautiful space.  Beginners and newcomers are always welcome.

For more information, phone: 087 2700572 or email:
susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

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www.mindhaven.ie 

There is a softness in the air today as I contemplate this month’s topic, soft rain outside and a real feeling of softness inside. Having been lucky enough to have had almost two weeks of heat and rest on holiday with beautiful friends, I am fuelled and resourced with a feeling of wellness and readiness. It had been years since I had a holiday like this, and I was very conscious of being present for it. Admittedly, I did not maintain my formal meditation practice as I would at home but used my breath, body and intentionality to stay in the moment. There is a thirty-second meditation practice by Dr Rick Hanson, called ‘Taking in the Good’ that I often refer to, that was utilised many times over the break, a kind of ‘banking’ of the gorgeous feelings of summer and soaking in the goodness that no doubt will stand to us in the Winter months. I used my journal to embed the memories even more.

One of the joys of being away from our usual schedules is that we have plenty of time to notice existing habits and change or develop new ones. One of my favourite ways of soaking in the good was to consciously stand or lie stock still and feel the heat enveloping my entire body, the feelings of perspiration on my face and skin, the discomfort and the ease, all of it. Sinking into whatever surface I was connecting with, sand or earth, beach towel or bed, saying to myself things like, “I am here, I am here, now.  I am so grateful for this. I will remember this”.  By being present in the first place, using this simple pause to notice the good feeling and purposefully take it in, helps add to our memory store. 

Another absolute delight of holidays was having no laptop and limited access to emails, phone, facebook and WhatsApp. This limitation was self-imposed by intentionally leaving my phone behind and always having it on silent, only checking it morning and evening. The headspace which this simple change created was phenomenal. Using eyes, ears and other senses instead of technology to ‘bank’ a memory, instead of the phone. Admitting that we have an addiction is not easy. It was my intention before the holiday to attempt to tackle my own distractions, particularly an addiction to the phone, by taking a more balanced approach to checking messages, and so on. This is still very much a work in progress, but having the intention and motivation to change a habit is a good starting point.

And as much as it’s lovely to go on holidays, there is something so lovely about coming home too.  Starting over, renewed and refreshed, each breath is a new beginning. Now that there is some spare fuel in the tank, I intend to use the rest of this slow summertime to fuel up even more, and go right back to basics, developing and deepening my own mindfulness meditation practice, availing of continuing professional development opportunities, and so on. I was so delighted to return to my drop-in mindfulness meditation group at CECAS, Myross Wood. This is a very special place of peace and presence where many others long before us have sat in stillness.  Anyone inspired to give mindfulness meditation a go please get in touch or just come along; it is so supportive to meditate together in a group and in this beautiful space.  Beginners and newcomers are always welcome.

In September I will be facilitating another Reconnect and Re-engage programme for family carers at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap. I can relate very much to many of the issues faced by family carers, having been one myself. Family carers are a group of people close to my heart. This is my fourth year delivering this free mindfulness-based programme for family carers in conjunction with CECAS. This is a down-to-earth and nourishing programme where we spend time, in a gentle and supported way, connecting with ourselves, others and with nature. Once completed, people then have the opportunity, if they wish, to join a monthly mindfulness/peer support gathering for family carers, which has been running for over a year now, where friendship, understanding and mutual support have grown and blossomed.  

This year’s Reconnect and Re-engage family carers programme runs on three consecutive weeks from 10.30am-1.30pm and includes a light lunch. The dates are as follows; Wednesday, September 25 and October 2, 9.  It is free of charge thanks to the support of Cork ETB and the 2024 REACH fund. 

Drop-in mindfulness sessions at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings through-out the summer months (August 6, 13, 20 and 27) from 10-11am. €12. All are welcome to join this wonderful community of practice.  

For more information, phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

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www.mindhaven.ie 

A subtle thought enters my mind that perhaps I wrote about the swallows before, but that’s ok, it happens every year and even though the feelings are similar, they can still catch us by surprise, as they announce the promise of brighter days. Somehow the swallows reminded me of how building and repeating small, simple habits, slowly and consistently, into our everyday lives, over time, a lifetime even, can build a simple, mindful life of noticing, paying attention and feeling thankful.  Even though meditation is a practice we repeat and repeat, time and again, it never loses its novelty and is never the same experience twice, we bring a curiosity and a gentleness to our practice to see what’s alive in this moment for us, in our inner and outer worlds.  

The swallows represent great hope, and their arrival is something to mark and celebrate in our year, currently an extremely challenging one on a global scale. These resilient birds make it back every single year. What an incredible achievement, reminding us of consistency, reliability and repetition in nature and the cycle of our lives. And because our seasons are no longer as clearly defined as before, these steady markers of the approaching summer are very reassuring. By learning to notice what’s going on around us through repeated meditation practice, we can really savour these gorgeous moments in the changing seasons and be so grateful for them. Like the quote above, however, it takes more than one swallow to make a summer and the same goes for mindfulness meditation, it takes more than one attempt.  

The skills of mindfulness and compassion are not developed overnight but learned repeatedly over time and deepened over the seasons of our lives.  The repetitive nature and transformative power of mindfulness, when practiced regularly, strengthens our inner reserves and resources for coping, perhaps with times of prolonged rain here at home and prolonged conflict situations that are happening around the world in this moment. Maybe there’s conflict in your home, in your close relationships or in your heart or mind as you read this. Or maybe you are ‘at war with yourself’, a phrase coined by Tara Brach, a state of being I think we can all identify with, as so many of us are in the habit of constantly criticising or giving out to ourselves.  

Being in the moment and noticing nature all around us can help us to shift our attention away from self-criticism, rumination or overthinking and simply take in what is here and now.  Over time, compassion-based mindfulness can help build peace and calm inside us which in turn can have a ripple effect, radiating outwards. With regular practice we learn to notice when we are at war either with ourselves or with others and we can bring compassion and soothing to these troubling situations. This in turn makes space for us to notice many things to be grateful for.  

We can give thanks that, along with the swallows, the sun has also arrived this week and what an instant boost of energy it brings. Feeling bare feet in sandals or on the ground, the smell of freshly cut grass, the heat of the sun on our bodies, birdsong, truly a feast for our senses. Bright sunny days have such restorative value and they have been scarce enough this year. Let these mindful lines by poet Danna Faulds inspire us to make the most of every precious day. “Do not let the day slip through your fingers, but live it fully now, this breath, this moment, catapulting you into full awareness. Time is precious, minutes disappearing like water into sand, unless you choose to pay attention”.

Monthly mindful journaling workshops are running at CECAS on April 27, May 18 and June 22. Each two-hour mindful journaling workshop will combine mindfulness meditation practices, reflective questions, poetry, and embodied writing techniques. There’s still time to book your place for Saturday, April 27, 4 – 6pm. €35 includes printable worksheets and audio recordings for listening at home.  

Weekly drop-in mindfulness sessions continue at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings through-out the year (May 7, 14, 21 and 28) from 10am-11am.  €12. All are welcome to join this wonderful community of practice.  

For more information, phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com
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Mindful movement is an embodying practice that I have grown to love, even though it can be challenging at times. It’s different to the more traditional forms of exercise that we are accustomed to. It isn’t about how far we move or how many repetitions we can get in, it is a slow form of focused movement. We place our full attention on our body as it moves. We feel our body in motion, and the energy shifting as we tune in with the wisdom of our own body. It is a wonderful practice that helps us to ‘drop’ our attention from the busy mind right down into the breathing body. It’s almost like a moving version of the body scan meditation; in that it fosters a deep sense of awareness of the body and helps us in how we relate to our bodies, developing a deeper appreciation, from the inside out.  

Having a sense of the mind and body connected and being in one place can be a rare occurrence, and is captured by James Joyce in the sentence, “Mr Duffy lived a short distance from his body”. I can really identify with the feeling of being disembodied. When I began my compassion-based mindfulness training, I remember having to have to look at, or physically touch, for example, my feet, to locate them during a body scan practice because I was not able to sense my body. Mindful movement is a great practice to inhabit our bodies and, as well as helping to clear the mind, can help to clear stagnant energy that may have gotten stuck in the body. Sometimes it can feel difficult to stay with the slow motion of the body because it can touch the edge of discomfort, and our mind may urge us to move at a greater speed, we may feel impatient. But that is the beauty of the practice, learning to stay with the slow movement, feeling every tiny, intricate sensation of our body in the moment, whether pleasant or unpleasant.  

Because I am familiar with feelings of disembodied and disconnection, I am in the habit now of regularly taking a pause and checking in with my body as I go about my daily business, feeling the contact of my feet on the ground as I stand or walk, noticing my fingers, hands and wrists as I type or drive, feeling the parts of my body that are connecting with the ground or seat, as well as the parts that are not touching anything, except maybe the air. I do this deliberate tuning in, now and then, on purpose, while I’m eating, driving, writing in my journal, and when practising mindful movement or dance. We can notice parts of our body that might feel tight or tense and with some gentle attention and movement we can help release and unstick physical or emotional tightness.

My interest in embodied, somatic practices is growing, encouraged by moments of being truly present in my body, that often-fleeting feeling of wholeness and presence. For example, in this moment I can sense my fingertips as they tap the keyboard, feel my elbows resting by my sides, my back leaning on the arm of the couch, my breath moving, the parts of my feet on the ground, aware of the space around me. By pausing and consciously nurturing a feeling of being at home in our own skin, even if for just a moment or two through-out the day, we learn to notice how different life feels when we’re at home in our bodies. These words from ‘The most important thing’ by Julia Fehrenbacher seem to fit here.

“I am making a home inside myself. / A shelter of kindness where everything / is forgiven, everything allowed—a quiet patch / of sunlight to stretch out without hurry, / where all that has been banished / and buried is welcomed, spoken, listened to—released. / A fiercely friendly place I can claim as my very own”.

Monthly mindful journaling workshops are running at CECAS on March 30, April 27, May 18 and June 22. Journaling is another way of being present and embodied. Each two-hour mindful journaling workshop will combine mindfulness meditation practices, reflective questions, poetry, and embodied writing techniques. Join me on Saturday, March 30, 4 – 6pm. €35 includes printable worksheets and audio recordings for listening at home.  

Weekly drop-in mindfulness sessions continue at CECAS, Myross Wood, Leap on Tuesday mornings through-out the year (March 5, 12, and 19) from 10am – 11am.  €12.  All are welcome to join this wonderful community of practice.  

For more information, phone: 087 2700572 or email: susanoreganmindfulness@gmail.com 

FB: susanoreganmindfulness

www.mindhaven.ie